Let's talk about Self-care

Self-care is an essential part of ensuring we are able to cope with the many things that are thrown at us developing your own self-care strategy is fundamentally important, it is not selfish to think of ourselves for part of the day.  It is ok to say I am just going to sit here for a while and just do nothing or take some time to treat yourself. In fact, people who take care of themselves are happier and have more stamina to become more accomplished in whatever they choose to do. We all deserve to spend a little bit of time taking care of ourselves. 

Having good self-care can really help to maintain positive mental health and emotional wellbeing. What you need for your self-care may adapt and change over time we need different things at different age groups.  

Supporting children and young people to develop positive self-care skills can support them throughout life to value themselves, reduce stress and develop positive mental health and wellbeing. Lead by example and start as young as possible and practise regularly so self-care becomes an embedded habit.  

You might have some ideas around self-care but it is important to work with your child to find out what works for them as you may have very different ideas around what makes good self-care. 

Somethings you might consider for yourself and your children include:  

• Relaxing bath 

• Physical activities 

• Tai chi 

• Yoga 

• Mindfulness 

• Guided imagery 

• Massage 

• Nourishing food 

• Quiet time 

• Reading or being read to 

• Having a cuddle 

• Listen to music 

• Move your body 

• Walking 

• Breathing – learn deep relaxing breathing techniques.  

• Journaling – create a self-care journal  

• Something creative.  

Create yourself a self-care box or bag so it’s there whenever you need it what are you going to put in it? Try and stimulate all 5 senses, sight, sound, touch, taste and smell.  

Here are some suggestions: 

• Book 

• Cuddle blanket 

• Smelly candle 

• Chocolate 

• Photos of friends and family  

It is also good for children to create one, they allow children the opportunity to learn how to self-regulate their emotions. This can be adapted and changed as they grow and mature but that comforting soft toy might always remain as part of the self-care box.

Children’s self-care box may include:  

• Arts and craft materials 

• Reading or storybooks 

• Soft blanket 

• Things that smell nice  

• Bubbles 

• Items from nature with interesting shapes and textures.  

It can be great fun creating a self-care bag or box you could make these and decorate with favourite pictures or colours.  By making and using one yourself you are really demonstrating to your child the importance you place and self-care.  

You could add written affirmation statements such as “I’m doing my best” this is something you can do as a family and add to the box. You could also write down coping strategies on small cards with words and pictures or you could create a poster.  

Self-care can actively contribute to developing a healthy immune system - remember, your mind and body are connected. It establishes lifelong patterns of behaviour, helps to regulate emotions, manages stress and anxiety whilst increasing resilience.  

Encourage your child or the children in your care to recognise when they need to access their own toolbox giving them a sense of control and trigger positive healthy emotions.

Supporting your child to develop good patterns of self-care may be one of the most special gifts you could give to your child and yourself. So, give it a try.

RESOURCES:

Read: Selfcare Summer- loads of extra tips and advice. https://www.annafreud.org/media/12101/final-selfcaresummer-secondary.pdf 

Go to Anna Freud self care where you will find nearly 200 hints, tips developed in partnership with young people from mental health support groups. Self-Care - https://www.annafreud.org/selfcare/ 

Youngminds.org.uk, https://youngminds.org.uk/ 

Parents. They need me-time, Too: A  self-care checklist to Do with your kids. https://www.parents.com/kids/health/childrens-mental-health/self-care-checklist-for-kids/ 

Suzy Reading – Self care for kids and parents- How to make it happen https://www.suzyreading.co.uk/article/self-care-kids-parents-make-happen/ 

Blessing Manifesting, Self-care &mental Health Tips for Kids, https://www.blessingmanifesting.com/self-care-for-kids-2/ 

Blurt foundation. 15 Self Care Ideas For Children. https://www.blurtitout.org/2019/11/07/15-care-children/ 

Anna Freud National Centre for Children and Families – Self Care is about the things we can do to look after our own mental health. https://www.annafreud.org/selfcare/ 

Action for children. 5 self-care tips for parents. https://www.actionforchildren.org.uk/news-and-blogs/parenting-tips/2019/march/5-self-care-tips-for-parents/ 

Connecticut Children’s – Resilience Is self-care: Kids Can learn How to manage Stress. https://www.connecticutchildrens.org/coronavirus/resilience-is-self-care-kids-can-learn-how-to-manage-stress/